Crazy About a Cowboy Read online

  Passing the master bedroom, she paused in the doorway. The remembered big bed sat in the same spot centered against the long wall, the huge dresser with the deep drawers on the adjacent wall. She missed all that space in her apartments.

  “Lisa?” Sam said behind her.

  She jumped and turned. How had he come up the stairs without her hearing him?

  “What are you doing?”

  “I didn’t hear you,” she said, taking a deep breath to settle her nerves. Only it didn’t settle anything. She drew in his scent, fresh and clean like the wide open spaces of the ranch with a hint of horse and leather.

  It was said smell was one of the strongest triggers for memories. It must be true, a million crowded instantly in her mind.

  Chapter Three

  “What are you doing?” Sam repeated, glancing beyond her into the bedroom, his expression enigmatic.

  “Nothing. I went to get something to read beside the magazines you brought up. I wanted something entertaining, not educational.” She held up the mystery, trying to ignore the guilty feeling that swept through her. She had no business staring into their room. The last thing she wanted was for Sam to think she wanted to go in.

  Sam’s room, not their room.

  “Are you feeling better?” he asked politely.

  She nodded, realizing how much the trek downstairs had taken out of her. She looked away, ready to head back to the guest room, trying to quell the memories that filled her.

  She remembered when he would have come in from working, swept her into his arms and kissed her breathless. Then carried her into their bedroom and shut the door firmly behind them. She had loved it when he’d come in unexpectedly during the day just to see her, complaining it had been too long since he’d last kissed her.

  Had she ever told him how exciting that had been?

  The poignant memory caught her unaware. She turned away from temptation, away from sad memories and headed down the hall toward the guest room. She had no business staying in Sam’s house. The sooner she left, the better it would be for all.

  “Lisa?” Sam called.

  She turned. He hadn’t moved, still stood by the door watching her with that unreadable expression.

  “I’m taking Joey on a ride. I came to see if you needed anything before we go.”

  She shook her head.

  “Where’s Joey now?” she asked.

  “Helping Jose soap some leather.” Sam’s expression softened and he almost smiled.

  Lisa felt the catch in her breath. She could look at him all day! Shouldn’t she be beyond this fluttering feeling? Where was the anger she’d felt so explosively two years ago? The hurt of his accusations? The feelings of abandonment that had seemed so strong when he had cut back on their dinners in town claiming ranch work came first?

  “He might want to change his name,” he said.

  “What?”

  “He found out Jose is Spanish for Joe, so now he’s saying he wants to be called Jose.”

  Lisa smiled. Sometimes Joey had the oddest take on things.

  Sam frowned. “If you’re okay, I’ll head back. I don’t pay the men to be babysitters.”

  He turned and descended the stairs. Lisa wondered why the sudden change in mood. She hadn’t asked him to come check on her.

  For a moment she almost called after him. To say what? Thanks for checking up on me? Want to talk?

  Surprised at the thought, she hurried into her room. There was nothing left to talk about. Hadn’t they talked at each other for months?

  And, of course, that had been the problem. They’d talked at each other, neither taking the time to really listen.

  ***

  Sam crossed the yard with long strides. He hadn’t needed to go inside to see Lisa. Pete said he’d checked on her when he took the soup he’d made especially for her lunch. But she was a guest in his household. He would have done the same with any visitor.

  But he wouldn’t have reacted to any other visitor’s smile like he had to Lisa’s. He’d felt it to his toes. His body tightening, his blood heating up in a flash. He didn’t liked his reaction at all.

  Scowling, he headed for the barn. He’d get Joey and take off for the northwest boundary. No one had been up there in a few days, and it didn’t pay to ignore the miles of fencing for long. Cattle had a way of pushing through at the most inconvenient time. The ride would be good for both of them.

  “Lisa doing okay?” Nick asked, leading a saddled horse from the barn.

  Sam nodded, the old memories surging despite his attempts to keep them locked down. At least he didn’t have to give way to them. He would control his reactions. The uneasy relationship he’d had with his brother was slowly solidifying. He would let nothing damage that fragile trust.

  “Did you remember Jennifer was coming this afternoon as soon as school is out to discuss the wedding reception?” Nick asked.

  “I remember,” Sam said. “Do you really need me here?”

  “She wants you involved,” Nick slapped the end of the reins into the palm of one hand. “She doesn’t have any brothers or sisters and this is her way to, um, bond with you. She wants your input for the reception since you said we could have it here on the ranch.”

  “I haven’t changed my mind. The main house will easily hold the whole town, if you’re going to invite them.”

  “She just may.”

  “I’ll be back around four.”

  “Think Lisa will still be here?” Nick said.

  “I haven’t heard she’s planning to leave this afternoon. Why?” Sam heard the sharp tone in his voice. It was instinctive, not intentional.

  “Just wondered. Pete said she was up this morning.”

  Nick turned to mount his horse. Settling in the saddle, he looked down at his brother, leaning over and resting a forearm on the saddle horn.

  “Lisa’s the mother of my nephew. If you get to have Joey here half the year, Jennifer will see a lot of him. Might as well meet his mother, I guess.”

  Sam shrugged. “We’ll see.”

  “Where are you heading?” Nick asked.

  “I’m taking Joey for a ride up by the Parkerson’s boundary. He likes riding and we can check that stretch of fencing at the same time.”

  Nick eased back in the saddle, reset his hat. “I’m going to the bore. One of the hands said the windmill was screeching. I want to see for myself before ordering repairs.”

  Sam nodded and continued into the barn. He and his brother had worked through their conflict. If only he and Lisa could have done so.

  But she’d taken off without a backward glance. They could never recapture the past. That door was shut. And there were added complications now that locked the door.

  He stopped in the doorway to the tack room, amused to see Joey industriously trying to help Jose with the leather work.

  “Ready to go, partner?” he asked.

  “Yes!” Joey came up like a shot. “I have to go, Jose. Me and Daddy’re going riding,” he said proudly. He loved being on the back of a horse.

  Sam couldn’t wait until Joey was old enough to handle his own mount. The two of them could cover the entire ranch on horseback.

  As he and Lisa had done when first married.

  He’d wanted to show off to her, show what she got by marrying him. She had been interested and full of questions. Sometimes they picnicked on the escarpment, other times they explored different shady spots as lovers.

  They’d even made use of one of the old line cabins one afternoon. The threatening storm had started sooner than he’d anticipated. Rather than race home in the rain, they’d holed up in the old cabin and whiled away the afternoon. He’d often wondered if that had been when Joey had been conceived.

  Damn, he had to stop thinking about the past, and about Lisa!

  ***

  By the time Sam and Joey returned later that afternoon, Jennifer’s car was parked in front of the house. Sam debated the merits of asking one of the men to take ca
re of the horse, or doing it himself. Anything to delay seeing Nick and Jennifer so happy together. It was hard to deal with in light of the mess he’d made of his own life.

  Jose ambled from the barn. “Boss,” he touched the brim of his hat.

  Sam lifted Joey. “Jose, would you take care of my mount?”

  “Sure thing.” The old Mexican cowhand reached for the reins.

  “I wanted to brush him,” Joey protested.

  “We have company. Your uncle Nick is getting married soon to a nice lady. She’s come to meet you. When she and Nick are hitched, she’ll be your Aunt Jennifer.”

  “Why are they getting married?” Joey asked, his arms firmly around his father’s neck as Sam strode to the house.

  “They want to be together.”

  “Is she a cowboy?”

  “No, she’s a school teacher. But she’ll live here on the ranch with Nick. She loves him and loves the ranch. And she really loves horses. She has a beauty herself.”

  Joey was silent a moment. Just as Sam reached the porch, he said, “Can Mommy and I live here on the ranch, too? We love it here!”

  Sam glanced at Joey’s shining eyes. This is where his son belonged. “Tell you what, why don’t you suggest that to your mom?”

  Lisa would probably kill him. But for the moment, he didn’t care. He was glad Joey wanted to live on the spread. And he’d be interested in just what she had to say about it.

  When they entered the house, Nick and Jennifer came out of the kitchen, Nick carrying a tray of icy beverages. Jennifer smiled at Sam and Joey.

  “Hi. And who is this? I bet you’re Joey.”

  Joey nodded his head, shyly clutching his dad.

  “I’m Jennifer.”

  “Aunt Jennifer,” he said.

  “That’s right, or I will be soon. I’m happy to meet you. I bet we get to be friends fast,” she said with a friendly smile.

  Sam set his son down and headed him toward the downstairs bathroom. “We’ll wash up and join you.”

  ***

  Lisa leaned against the wall a few feet back from the top of the stairs. No one had noticed her yet, and she took the moment to study Jennifer and Nick before descending. She’d dressed a little while ago in jeans and a comfortable blue top. Not that she had much choice. Sam had only grabbed a few things for her when they left Fort Worth.

  Her shower earlier had left her hair shiny and full of body. She had put on a little makeup just so she didn’t look so pale, she told herself.

  She thought to surprise Sam by coming downstairs. It was she who was surprised. She hadn’t expected company. Should she continue down, or return to her room? Was she up to meeting the bride?

  Nick had looked good--and happy. She was glad to know he’d found someone special. Despite Sam’s suspicions, she was glad Nick was so in love with someone he wanted to marry her.

  They’d been high school sweethearts. Those feelings had faded, however. Not that Sam had believed it. He persisted in thinking she had a hankering for Nick.

  How he could have ever thought such a thing was beyond her. He was twice the man his brother was! Twice as exciting, twice as appealing, and twice as sexy. She should have handled things more maturely.

  Lisa had a real thing about maturity these days because she felt her own behavior in the past had lacked that commodity.

  Taking a deep breath, she decided to continue down the stairs.

  “Mommy, Mommy, you’re better!” Joey came racing down the hall just as she reached the bottom. He flung himself around her legs and squeezed tightly.

  “I’m better,” she said, sitting on the bottom step and pulling him into her lap, hugging him tightly. She looked up into Sam’s dark blue eyes.

  “Guess what,” Joey said, excitedly. “Daddy said to ask you if we can stay here! We can live here all the time, like Jennifer is gonna do. Can we, Mommy? Can we live here?”

  The color left her cheeks as she looked at Sam in disbelief. “No, we certainly can’t live here! How dare you suggest such a thing!”

  He shrugged as Nick came into the hall from the living room. For a moment he glanced between the two of them, then nodded. “Lisa.”

  Not exactly a ringing welcome, Lisa thought. “Hi Nick.”

  He put his hands in the pockets of his jeans and rocked back on his boot heels, his eyes narrowed as he looked at her. Was there a hint of hostility in the air?

  “You’re looking better than I’d thought you’d be,” he said.

  “If you like pale as a ghost,” Sam muttered.

  Lisa ignored Sam. “I’m feeling better, just a little shaky. I hear congratulations are in order.”

  Nick nodded, looking around, and reaching out to take Jennifer’s hand as she joined them, his expression softening as he smiled at her.

  “Jennifer, Lisa.”

  “Hi, Lisa,” Jennifer said.

  Lisa set Joey on his feet and slowly rose to her own. She smiled politely at Jennifer, struck at how fresh and pretty she looked. It made Lisa even more conscious of her own wan appearance. She also noted the contrast in Nick’s manner. What was going on?

  “Nice to meet you, Jennifer. Best wishes for a lifetime of happiness.”

  Jennifer smiled happily and leaned against Nick. “Thanks. I expect to have just that with this guy!”

  Lisa had expected that as well once. Sam had been larger than life for her. Older by five years, he’d already begun to make a mark on his newly-inherited ranch when he’d starting dating her. And with those added years had come experience enough to sweep her off her feet. She’d felt very special in those days.

  It had been a long time since she’d felt special, she thought wryly.

  “I fixed some lemonade,” Jennifer said into the growing silence. “Does anyone want any?”

  “I do,” Joey said promptly, racing for the living room.

  In a few minutes, everyone had moved into the large comfortable room and were seated, icy glasses in hand. Tension shimmered in the air. Lisa looked from one brother to the other, both had their gaze on her. Were they waiting for her to say something?

  Sam dominated the room. It was all she could do to concentrate on Nick and Jennifer and not stare at Sam, absorbing every nuance and expression that crossed his face.

  Not that there would be many. He was a master at keeping his thoughts to himself unless he wanted others to know.

  She felt warm, flushed. It couldn’t be from the flu, she hadn’t had a fever for a couple of days. Maybe it was the sense of awareness she experienced being around Sam again.

  Why was he looking at her?

  Jennifer began to speak rapidly and Lisa tried to concentrate on what she was saying.

  “So, of course it’s the typical June wedding. But I don’t care. I only expect to get married once, so I’m doing it up just the way I want.” She glanced at Nick and smiled. “Or the way we want, I hope.”

  “Whatever you want, is what I want,” he said with a smile.

  Lisa blinked. Had she heard the man correctly? She flicked a glance at Sam, startled to find his gaze still on her. They locked eyes for a second, sharing the moment, almost as if they shared a common thought. Nick? Acting like a love stuck cowboy? It was mind boggling.

  But nice, she thought wistfully, wishing Sam had felt like that about her.

  What, exactly, had he felt for her? Passion and desire, she knew that. She’d been barely twenty-two when they’d gotten married. Now that she was almost twenty-eight, she could see she’d been too young. She hadn’t finished growing up. But at the time, she’d insisted she knew what she wanted and it had been Sam Haller.

  The moment ended and she looked away, upset with the thoughts that came unbidden. They’d married fast, loved furiously, and separated after only two years.

  Jennifer was speaking again, “...so since I’ve lost touch with so many friends since college, I thought we might as well get married here. My folks will fly in and a few close friends. And my grandparents. Othe
rwise, our guests will be my new friends and neighbors here in Tumbleweed.”

  Lisa nodded as if she’d heard the entire thing. “That’s nice.”

  “And then we can party here all night before leaving on our honeymoon,” Jennifer finished brightly, smiling at Sam.

  Lisa remembered her own wedding, small and quiet. The brief honeymoon in San Antonio. She’d loved the Riverwalk, and the Old Town and the hours spent with Sam in the hotel room.

  Heat swept through her again. She dare not meet his gaze. What if he were remembering? What if the memories were unaccompanied by the same fondness?

  A jarring memory surfaced unbidden--Sam’s jealousy about Nick. She still remembered his comments on their wedding night of how jealous he was of the fact she and Nick had slept together before Sam had known her. Then he’d set about to make her forget everyone she’d ever known before. And done it masterfully.

  There was no comparison between Sam and anyone else and especially teenage fumbling in the dark.

  And it wasn’t as if he’d been celibate before their marriage, she’d reminded him.

  The exploits of Sam and Nick were legendary around Tumbleweed when they could escape from their domineering father.

  Even with all that had gone on between them, she remembered their lovemaking as the stuff of legends. The man had no idea how much she’d cherished their nights together.

  And not only the nights. There were afternoons, mornings and everything in between. In the house, in the barn, under the open sky and once in a leaky old cabin on the edge of the ranch.

  She shifted restlessly in the chair. It wasn’t fair to have perfection and lose it.

  “You all right?” Sam asked softly.

  She looked at him, his eyes dark with concern, his attention focused on her. Once again her heart skipped a beat, then began a rapid tempo. What would it be like to touch his cheek with her fingertips, thread her fingers through that rich dark hair, feel the remembered strength of his muscles against her softness once again? Just once.

  Hadn’t she heard somewhere, or read in a woman’s magazine, that divorced couples sometimes got together for old times sake? Could she do that? Would he even want another night together?